Let me disclose that I cannot take full credit for this brilliant idea. I read an article in one of my parenting/soccer mom magazines someone purchased a subscription for me as a gift. In an issue they shared a story that inspired me to set a goal for our family.
Goal: We want to take Adeline to all 50 states by the time she
graduates from high school. That is about 3ish states per year.
Lofty?
Probably.
Crazy? Possibly.
Impossible? Nah.
For weeks I jokingly mentioned the 50 states or bust goal to Brett, and then to the rest of the family. In reality I was just verbalizing it enough to make it materialize, because it wasn't a few weeks after that mention that I invited she and I on a road trip my parents had planned almost a year prior. I don't normally invite myself on such adventures, but they agreed to let us stow away. The days following I packed us up for a 9 day/1,500+ mile trek up north. We hit 5 states that trip alone, and Adeline had a freaking blast. 8 months have passed and she still mentions it.
Thanks to my job (and what is evolving into quite the family business) as Junk Drunk Jones we get to travel a bit. We just got back from a trip out west that knocked off another 4 states on her list.
Is this goal gonna work out? I have no idea, but I am going to try like hell to make it happen. What is your favorite state? When we make it there, what should we be sure to see?
Showing posts with label travel. Show all posts
Showing posts with label travel. Show all posts
Saturday, April 5, 2014
Monday, June 17, 2013
Mexican Adventure Log Day 4 Part 2 of 2
Alright ladies and gents, I left off at the cenote - travelling to the ruins. We spent an ungodly amount of time in the van driving across the country that day (seriously it took up about 4.5 hours of the schedule). The road trip for the day looked like: Dirt road - dirt road - two lane road that everyone knows is just a one lane road - side of the road trash - wild dog - repeat. I have never seen so much litter in all my life. Back home I feel bad just throwing a banana peel out the window (that usually goes well for me, remember this post?). Back to the two lane one lane roads...We hit a traffic jam on the way to the ruins caused by road construction (which really just looked like a bunch of random dudes playing with heavy equipment) in which we watched a large commercial coca cola truck smash, and scrape, the side of the cement roller. Just scooted right a long too. One interesting factoid I want to point out: we were shown a small concrete building (let's guess, maybe 300 s.f.) with a 100s.f. satellite parked right on top of the building. The guide told us that it was the satellite school for the local mayan children. The mexican government felt that it would be cheaper to provide a teacher via satellite and on a screen for these kiddos vs. a real teacher in the classroom. That seemed very strange to me. I wonder how well these little guys can learn via screen and not hands on?
Litter and odd schools aside, that is neither here nor there. We arrived at Ek Balam, mid afternoon. Just the perfect time to feel like your face is melting off. Our tour guide gave us all a hefty bottle of water for the trek. We regrouped with a new tour guide provided and listened to the history of the ruins, and what some of the magnificent structures were used for. We were embraced by the shade of a few outlining trees during our history lesson, and we all dispersed accordingly to get a good shady listening spot. However, during the tour guides schpeel I kept hearing a spitting noise. I disregarded it at first because, people spit right? Sometimes. I guess. But wait, I heard it again, and again. Much to my surprise, the Russian duo (a mother and daughter) were standing right behind us. What do you think they might have been doing? Think for a sec. This might throw you for a loop. You think you got it?
The mother, was taking her water bottle, taking a big sip of water...AND THEN SPITTING IT ONTO HER DAUGHTER. Swig, spit, swig, spit. All over this ladies shirt, shoulder area, back, the whole deal. ..... I KNOW RIGHT?! $%&*#@!
She couldn't have come up with a better method of cooling her off? I can think of like, at least 5 ways to incorporate cold water FROM THE BOTTLE to cooling someone off that don't require sloshing it around your gross (and considerably warm) mouth first. For starters, just drink your own cold water, jesus. Brett and I were fairly terrified of them from that point on. And if it weren't for the small shady parameter we had secured we would have gotten the hell away from the spitty Russians. I can't be thankful enough that they were socially awkward and far from cordial or they may have offered to spit on us too. I would have died. If I had known that this was going to go down I would have attempted to see if during our lunch she actually chewed her own food, or had her mom do that for her too. Hello Alicia Silverstone.
We proceed, and wander through the amazingness of the ruins. Once I could regain my focus it was really an awesome experience. These structures are said to have been inhabited 600 BC-1600AD, and it was once a very powerful city. It had several large structures on its grounds. We were able to climb the main temple. At first I laughed at the idea of actually making it to the top, being perfectly content just touching the structure and photographing it. But our entire goofy gaggle slowly crept and crawled to the tippy top. That's almost 100 feet high, narrow stairs with no railing, no rope, no nothing! Going up wasn't the issue, climbing down sorta sideways sorta backwards was the hard part! At least I have little feet to fit nicely on the narrow stairs - Brett's monster feet in his ski sized flip flops had a hell of a time scaling the stairway down. I am pretty sure I just freaked myself out into closing my eyes most of the climb down. Intuitive feet, ftw.
Litter and odd schools aside, that is neither here nor there. We arrived at Ek Balam, mid afternoon. Just the perfect time to feel like your face is melting off. Our tour guide gave us all a hefty bottle of water for the trek. We regrouped with a new tour guide provided and listened to the history of the ruins, and what some of the magnificent structures were used for. We were embraced by the shade of a few outlining trees during our history lesson, and we all dispersed accordingly to get a good shady listening spot. However, during the tour guides schpeel I kept hearing a spitting noise. I disregarded it at first because, people spit right? Sometimes. I guess. But wait, I heard it again, and again. Much to my surprise, the Russian duo (a mother and daughter) were standing right behind us. What do you think they might have been doing? Think for a sec. This might throw you for a loop. You think you got it?
The mother, was taking her water bottle, taking a big sip of water...AND THEN SPITTING IT ONTO HER DAUGHTER. Swig, spit, swig, spit. All over this ladies shirt, shoulder area, back, the whole deal. ..... I KNOW RIGHT?! $%&*#@!
She couldn't have come up with a better method of cooling her off? I can think of like, at least 5 ways to incorporate cold water FROM THE BOTTLE to cooling someone off that don't require sloshing it around your gross (and considerably warm) mouth first. For starters, just drink your own cold water, jesus. Brett and I were fairly terrified of them from that point on. And if it weren't for the small shady parameter we had secured we would have gotten the hell away from the spitty Russians. I can't be thankful enough that they were socially awkward and far from cordial or they may have offered to spit on us too. I would have died. If I had known that this was going to go down I would have attempted to see if during our lunch she actually chewed her own food, or had her mom do that for her too. Hello Alicia Silverstone.
We proceed, and wander through the amazingness of the ruins. Once I could regain my focus it was really an awesome experience. These structures are said to have been inhabited 600 BC-1600AD, and it was once a very powerful city. It had several large structures on its grounds. We were able to climb the main temple. At first I laughed at the idea of actually making it to the top, being perfectly content just touching the structure and photographing it. But our entire goofy gaggle slowly crept and crawled to the tippy top. That's almost 100 feet high, narrow stairs with no railing, no rope, no nothing! Going up wasn't the issue, climbing down sorta sideways sorta backwards was the hard part! At least I have little feet to fit nicely on the narrow stairs - Brett's monster feet in his ski sized flip flops had a hell of a time scaling the stairway down. I am pretty sure I just freaked myself out into closing my eyes most of the climb down. Intuitive feet, ftw.
Brett really liked seeing all of the lizards roaming the grounds too:
All in all, it was everything I had hoped to see, and more! One more thing to cross off the bucket list. Maybe when Adeline grows up we can take her and she can experience the greatness too. I will be sure to bring a cool rag for her, and make her drink her own damn water so I don't have to resort to spitting on her to keep her cool! Oy.
Mexican Adventure Log Day 4- Part 1 of 2.
When I started thinking about the "things to do" in Mexico, the only thing I really wanted to experience was a trip to some Mayan ruins. The rest of the trip? Relax! I won't lie, I much preferred the relaxed environment of Ireland where we were free to roam the countryside in our ridiculously small (and pink, damn thing was pink) rental car. There weren't people every ten feet trying to sell you a tour, and I really liked that. Not that I thought Mexico would be anything like Ireland, I am just stating aloud my travel preferences.
I digress. We actually had an appointment the first morning of the Mexico trip to discuss the thousands of touristtraps stops that were at our disposal. They bring out the big guns first. The stops that require you riding on a huge tour bus packed to the brim with 40+ hungover idiots such as ourselves (to the tune of $150-300 per person). No thanks. Then time to discuss the "booze cruise" tours. Same concept, but on a tiny catamaran with no escape from the freakishly hot Mexican sun (yes, I realize we all share the same sun, but it seriously feels hotter there). No thanks. Then the Mayan ruin tours. She busted out several lovely laminated sheets of combo tours with glamorous photos of Chichen Itza (Chicken Pizza), Coba, Tulum. Then she hesitated to pull something else out of the bag. I asked what else she had rattling around in there that was a little less, crowded? A little less, commercialized? She then pulls out this poor little flier for Ek Balam. I am not going to say it isn't commercialized, hell, the fact that the Mexican government is practically forcing the Mayan people to open up shop at any of these stops to us stupid tourists is bad enough. I would like to note I also requested somewhere we could actually climb some of the temples. Many now have restricted access.
Slowly yet surely they are shutting down climbing opportunities to a lot of these ruin sites. Apparently when big fat Americans drink Tequila all week and then attempt to climb the intricately narrow stairs of these Mayan temples...they fall. Thus, ruining any possible awesome experiences for the rest of the world.
Long story long, we signed up to go to Ek Balam which also included a pit stop to a cenote (underground cave/water system). When Wednesday rolled around we went to the lobby of the resort to join our fellow vacationers on this nice little tour. To our surprise, we were the only folks on that entire resort going to Ek Balam, so we hopped onto our small, emptybus van and geared up for an eventful day. We had a great tour guide for the day, named Danique. She is from the Netherlands, so I thought it odd she happened upon being a tour guide at an obscure spot but hey whatever! Went to another resort where we picked up: a slew of crunchy canadian kids, some french people, and 2 bat shit crazy Russian ladies (I will explore further soon enough). I was the only American on board, I am glad they didn't feed me to wild dogs that roam countryside.
*Insert long bus ride here*
Factoid, factoid, factoid.
Stop #1 - The cenote. We were told ahead of time that this would be occurring, but it was neat to be a part of a Mayan blessing. In a nut shell, when the Mexican governmentpolitely asked practically forced the Mayan people to get on board the tourism money train they said that they would be comfortable allowing strangers into their sacred water systems aka, these cenotes, IF they went through a blessing performed by a shaman beforehand. Followed by a thorough shower before touching these special waters.
We went through the blessing, and the painfully cold shower - saw that there were two methods of entry for the cenote. 1- Rappel or 2- Take handy dandy stairs. I decided against being hooked up to the intriguing system of levers and pulleys and took the stairs. As most tourist spots do, they had entertaining stations inside the cave. Zip lines, rope walks, floaties for relaxing, and so on. My idea of adventure did not involve any of those things, I got in about knee deep and my mind started to shut down it was so cold. While Brett prepped for a refreshing zip line dip I scoured for a floatie. I knew he wouldn't let me leave without at least getting in the water. Whilst finding a floatie to suit my size to my dismay I also found 3 spiders and abandoned project. Stuck my feet back in the freezing waters and grinned at Brett as he proceeded to do ALL THE THINGS. You go hunny.
Other buses started showing up, gaggles of really awkward tourists started to fill up the poor little cave and it's frigid waters, and we headed out and had a yummy lunch.
This post seems to really have gotten lengthy, my apologies. I will break it into a two parter and wrap up with the good stuff: THE MAYAN RUINS.
I digress. We actually had an appointment the first morning of the Mexico trip to discuss the thousands of tourist
Slowly yet surely they are shutting down climbing opportunities to a lot of these ruin sites. Apparently when big fat Americans drink Tequila all week and then attempt to climb the intricately narrow stairs of these Mayan temples...they fall. Thus, ruining any possible awesome experiences for the rest of the world.
Long story long, we signed up to go to Ek Balam which also included a pit stop to a cenote (underground cave/water system). When Wednesday rolled around we went to the lobby of the resort to join our fellow vacationers on this nice little tour. To our surprise, we were the only folks on that entire resort going to Ek Balam, so we hopped onto our small, empty
*Insert long bus ride here*
Factoid, factoid, factoid.
Stop #1 - The cenote. We were told ahead of time that this would be occurring, but it was neat to be a part of a Mayan blessing. In a nut shell, when the Mexican government
We went through the blessing, and the painfully cold shower - saw that there were two methods of entry for the cenote. 1- Rappel or 2- Take handy dandy stairs. I decided against being hooked up to the intriguing system of levers and pulleys and took the stairs. As most tourist spots do, they had entertaining stations inside the cave. Zip lines, rope walks, floaties for relaxing, and so on. My idea of adventure did not involve any of those things, I got in about knee deep and my mind started to shut down it was so cold. While Brett prepped for a refreshing zip line dip I scoured for a floatie. I knew he wouldn't let me leave without at least getting in the water. Whilst finding a floatie to suit my size to my dismay I also found 3 spiders and abandoned project. Stuck my feet back in the freezing waters and grinned at Brett as he proceeded to do ALL THE THINGS. You go hunny.
Other buses started showing up, gaggles of really awkward tourists started to fill up the poor little cave and it's frigid waters, and we headed out and had a yummy lunch.
This post seems to really have gotten lengthy, my apologies. I will break it into a two parter and wrap up with the good stuff: THE MAYAN RUINS.
Wandering the grounds at the cenote.
some photos of the cenote provided by the photographer there.
The group with the shaman.
Thursday, June 13, 2013
Mexican Adventure Log Day 3
Well, Day #3 can be summarized into 1 (ok maybe 5) easy bullet points, and no photographic aids.
1 - We drank the water. Welp, that concludes Day #3 folks!
2 - We attempted some earlier morning sun bathing. Not the best plan for 2 of the ginger-est people at the resort. I can fake it, as you read from the last post I had a spray tan. I still managed a good, and quick, burn. In order for Brett to prep hisfreckles skin he has to allot around 45 minutes to cover himself in sunscreen. Kudos to him for the time and attention he pays to preventing sun damage. All efforts being futile because he always gets a good burn going regardless of SPF/YMCA/JK. I think that if his freckles would just get on board, and join forces they could all group up and pretend to look like a tan. Poor guy.
3 - After we gave up on our summer glow we retreated to the room to cry about our skin, our digestive systems, and spent a good portion of the day watching forensic shows on tv.
4 - We conquered our fear of the mexican atm machine and finally procured some pesos.
5 - Realized that we really, really miss our kid.
Once again- my apologies for not providing photos of Day #3, it is better this way.
1 - We drank the water. Welp, that concludes Day #3 folks!
2 - We attempted some earlier morning sun bathing. Not the best plan for 2 of the ginger-est people at the resort. I can fake it, as you read from the last post I had a spray tan. I still managed a good, and quick, burn. In order for Brett to prep his
3 - After we gave up on our summer glow we retreated to the room to cry about our skin, our digestive systems, and spent a good portion of the day watching forensic shows on tv.
4 - We conquered our fear of the mexican atm machine and finally procured some pesos.
5 - Realized that we really, really miss our kid.
Once again- my apologies for not providing photos of Day #3, it is better this way.
Wednesday, June 12, 2013
Mexican Adventure Log Day 2
Father, it has been one month since my last confession blog post.
At this rate, I am going to finish reliving the story of my Mexican Adventures in 7 months... Really, it took me one month to post Day #2? Why didn't you guys slap me?
So, how about this, I just churn this stuff out in a day or two. And move on? Sound good? I haven't even attempted any posts about crap that people have forgotten too. For shame, for shame.
Ahem, Day 2.
I am pretty sure I woke up around 5am, but I would also like to note that it took me about 4 days to figure out what time it actually was. The room clock, the room tv, and both of our phones all displayed different times. That's 4 different times to choose from. And if you ask a resort staff member? It is tequila time, every time. I gave up.
Decided to take a shower, harmless right? Apparently the entire time I was showering I was unaware that I was also flooding the entire room. THE ENTIRE ROOM. Oopsy. Brett hopped out of bed, and into standing water. I would like to explain how I managed to do this, but I really can't. I am just special like that. Nothing that a few clothes lines and furniture re-arrangement can't fix.
If you happen upon Playa del Carmen, 5th avenue district is apparently the bees knees. We wandered it's street(s) as we were located a block away. It was nice, and it was touristy. Got my fill of local handmade chotchkies in all the souvenir spots. Declined dozens of offers for special tours. Learned that Brett will be widely recognized for the next week as Red beard/whiskers/or some other combo nickname for a large man with a large beard. One fellow selling tours specifically stopped him to ask what his plans were:
Random tour seller (R.T.S): "Whiskers! What are you guys up to this week?"
Brett: "We have a tour tomorrow to see Ek Balam."
R.T.S.: "Well, what are you doing the rest of the week?"
Brett: "Her." *points to an extremely red faced me*
R.T.S.: *blinks*
He definitely knows the right things to say huh? I couldn't possibly be more proud.
The last stop we made was to another souvenir shop to browse and an old white lady stops me to ask an important question: "Ma'am, do you work here?".
Me: "Not unless my husband has just made some sort of terrible arrangement, no, I don't".
-This did however, make me want to give my spray tan lady an extra tip, as she apparently made me look like a local for the week.
*Insert some detail about more delicious food and drinks for dinner, and going to bed here*
Oh! And a photo or two, because visuals are generally entertaining:
At this rate, I am going to finish reliving the story of my Mexican Adventures in 7 months... Really, it took me one month to post Day #2? Why didn't you guys slap me?
So, how about this, I just churn this stuff out in a day or two. And move on? Sound good? I haven't even attempted any posts about crap that people have forgotten too. For shame, for shame.
Ahem, Day 2.
I am pretty sure I woke up around 5am, but I would also like to note that it took me about 4 days to figure out what time it actually was. The room clock, the room tv, and both of our phones all displayed different times. That's 4 different times to choose from. And if you ask a resort staff member? It is tequila time, every time. I gave up.
Decided to take a shower, harmless right? Apparently the entire time I was showering I was unaware that I was also flooding the entire room. THE ENTIRE ROOM. Oopsy. Brett hopped out of bed, and into standing water. I would like to explain how I managed to do this, but I really can't. I am just special like that. Nothing that a few clothes lines and furniture re-arrangement can't fix.
If you happen upon Playa del Carmen, 5th avenue district is apparently the bees knees. We wandered it's street(s) as we were located a block away. It was nice, and it was touristy. Got my fill of local handmade chotchkies in all the souvenir spots. Declined dozens of offers for special tours. Learned that Brett will be widely recognized for the next week as Red beard/whiskers/or some other combo nickname for a large man with a large beard. One fellow selling tours specifically stopped him to ask what his plans were:
Random tour seller (R.T.S): "Whiskers! What are you guys up to this week?"
Brett: "We have a tour tomorrow to see Ek Balam."
R.T.S.: "Well, what are you doing the rest of the week?"
Brett: "Her." *points to an extremely red faced me*
R.T.S.: *blinks*
He definitely knows the right things to say huh? I couldn't possibly be more proud.
The last stop we made was to another souvenir shop to browse and an old white lady stops me to ask an important question: "Ma'am, do you work here?".
Me: "Not unless my husband has just made some sort of terrible arrangement, no, I don't".
-This did however, make me want to give my spray tan lady an extra tip, as she apparently made me look like a local for the week.
*Insert some detail about more delicious food and drinks for dinner, and going to bed here*
Oh! And a photo or two, because visuals are generally entertaining:
This pretty much sums up our relationship. Brett being lewd, me being embarrassed. It is a delicate balance, in which he usually tips the scales of.
A forced normalcy photo, you can tell he really just wants to go back to his original pose.
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Mexican Adventure Log - Day 1
Who has two thumbs and brought a journal on vacation?
Pretty sure I am day dreaming in this photograph. About my journals. "...Dear diary..."
But hey, at least you get to hear about the trip in excruciating detail. I would like to start by saying that fate was working against us for this trip.We I decided to go Playa del Carmen, and stay at The Royal for an entire week sans baby. He reluctantly agreed at first. I thought that planning a romantical getaway with the Mister was going to be as magical as the trip itself. Then I realized I was married to a green card totin' disaster and all of those high hopes faded away.
Problem #1-Canada took its sweet ass time renewing Brett's passport, so much so that we were considering ways to utilize our trip insurance to cancel the trip. Our best method for implementing the insurance plan was to run over Brett with a car, which as some of you know, I already have good practice with (that link here). Luckily for Brett it arrived 3 weeks prior to our departure. Phew.
Problem #2- Departure day. We had to take 2 detours en route to the airport for a highway shutdown due to a shooting standoff with the police. Once we were dropped off at our terminal we realized something else- THIS WASN'T OUR TERMINAL, NAY, AIRPORT. Shuttled to the appropriate airport just in time.
All crappy travels aside, we arrived in Mexico unscathed. When we got to the resort I was almost certain the shuttle had taken us to the wrong place. It was much too nice. We pretended to know what we were doing and were checked in with champagne in one hand, and hot towel in the other, in no time. A random man walked up to us and said "checking in?" to which we replied yes, and he said "good, have this" and hands us a styrofoam cooler. I envisioned a black market organ to be the contents of our new found gift, but luckily it was empty. We totally took it, and totally used it.
We learned immediately that we would be fat by ends week with the amazing food that was at every corner of this resort. We also discovered our room had it's own liquor dispenser. Oh snap.
This nerd:
But hey, at least you get to hear about the trip in excruciating detail. I would like to start by saying that fate was working against us for this trip.
Problem #1-Canada took its sweet ass time renewing Brett's passport, so much so that we were considering ways to utilize our trip insurance to cancel the trip. Our best method for implementing the insurance plan was to run over Brett with a car, which as some of you know, I already have good practice with (that link here). Luckily for Brett it arrived 3 weeks prior to our departure. Phew.
Problem #2- Departure day. We had to take 2 detours en route to the airport for a highway shutdown due to a shooting standoff with the police. Once we were dropped off at our terminal we realized something else- THIS WASN'T OUR TERMINAL, NAY, AIRPORT. Shuttled to the appropriate airport just in time.
All crappy travels aside, we arrived in Mexico unscathed. When we got to the resort I was almost certain the shuttle had taken us to the wrong place. It was much too nice. We pretended to know what we were doing and were checked in with champagne in one hand, and hot towel in the other, in no time. A random man walked up to us and said "checking in?" to which we replied yes, and he said "good, have this" and hands us a styrofoam cooler. I envisioned a black market organ to be the contents of our new found gift, but luckily it was empty. We totally took it, and totally used it.
We learned immediately that we would be fat by ends week with the amazing food that was at every corner of this resort. We also discovered our room had it's own liquor dispenser. Oh snap.
And here we are prepping to head out for our first night in Playa del Carmen:
That concludes Day 1. Hold your applause for the end of the week's final log.
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Departures
I have a weird habit of taking my dad's overly pretentious Departures magazines and cutting little pictures out of them. I still can't figure out why in the hell my dad gets the magazine, in 9 years I have never seen him even open one issue. This is the man who got drunk, lost a bet, and brought a turkey(click for that link) home to me as a "gift". So to peruse a magazine chock full of Louis Vuitton gear, and more expensive time pieces than you could shake a stick at is baffling to me. He always just leaves the unread magazines on my desk for me. I also can't figure out what I am going to do with all of these tiny awesome pictures.
The magazine does nothing whatsoever for me, aside from making me realize how rich I am not. It is borderline depressing to see that many designer ads, and articles about luxurious and first-class-to-the-max world travel.
Just out of curiosity I did a quick review and I found the word Luxury 36 times from cover to cover in this month's issue (and that was after I cut it up). Seriously, one of the cheapest things I could find was a $15,000 per person trip to Mexico. I can get you to Mexico, for $150. Plus interest, or a bag of weed or something. I can sell that quite easily once we get there, I hear we can find some nice gentleman from what I hear is called the Cartel? Yes, they can assist you after I drop you off. I imagine that at the rate of $15,000 for one vacation the person who inquired about the Departures ad for a vacation to Mexico would be transported about the country in that vehicle they put the pope in. Fully supplied with more issues of Departures for their viewing pleasure.
Now, what to do with all of these tiny little pictures.
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
BBQ and Blues
The title should probably be more appropriately named BBQ and booze. Brett and I took a trip to Memphis with my parents a few summers ago, and I can't wait to go back.
On arrival we made a quick decision that our initial hotel choice left much to be desired. We really wanted to be able to get to our car in the morning with all wheels in tact, and no one with a gun wound.
We wound up booking at a snazzy place right on Beale Street. We then busied ourselves with finding a local BBQ joint to get dinner (Image A ). None of the meals in Memphis disappointed.
After dinner mom decided to turn in and relax in the room (which was good because it probably cost
an immense amount). Glad someone enjoyed it. Brett, Dad, and I soon found that getting a beer was going to be easier than finding a taxi that wasn't pulled by horse. I will get to those guys later.The entire perimeter of downtown Memphis is covered in beer vendors. The company name? Big Ass Beers. How perfect! They indeed sold big ass beers, and also margarita-esque mixed drinks in buckets with a handful of straws. You know, for sharing. Remind me why A: I've never been here before, and B:Why I haven't been back since. (Image B - almost all of us looking at the camera). You can tell this was a few summers ago by the fluffyness of Brett- He was still a handsome devil.
We were there, we saw, and we conquered... almost every other Big Ass beer stand from beginning to end of Beale Street. We camped out for an hour or so to watch some street performers sing the blues, naturally. My dad took a liking to this poor old bastard who was playing the guitar like it was saving his life. So we watched his little street gang of a band play for what seemed like forever. It was spectacular. I have circled little guitar man in (Image C) he is about to scale the railing of the pavilion. Rock on little man, rock on.
Many a beer, and many a blues song later we decided to mosey back to the pricey hotel and get an ear full from mom for our late night shenanigans. There are a lot of horse drawn carriages around town that you
can pay a hefty price to be carted through a tour of the city on. The later it gets the more of these carriages sit parked at the sidewalks. I honestly can't tell you the details of how I managed to do this, but all of my "big ass beers" resulted in me walking into a "big ass horse". A parked big ass horse. I am not sure why Brett and dad (who were directly behind me) didn't see these events unfolding fast enough to quickly move me out of the line of fire. I suspect it is because they were busy laughing and watching in horror. Hilarious horror.
So I full on crash into this horse, and I didn't yell out, or move quickly in embarrassment.
Nope, I just took a step back, and apologized to the horse, and proceeded into the street. Apologized to the horse? Really Stef? Don't worry I am shaking my head too. When we made it back to the room mom didn't scold us, and if she had we would not have heard it through all of the noise coming from the partyers in the streets. I wish I were joking, it was that loud (even from the 7th floor up) until about 4am. Then awkward scary movie silence.
Needless to say, I rather liked Memphis. Who wants to go back with us? I promise I won't run into any parked horses next time. Totally kidding, I make no promises.
- I almost forgot to mention, Rendezvous has the best ribs I have ever tasted
in my life. That place is spectacular.
On arrival we made a quick decision that our initial hotel choice left much to be desired. We really wanted to be able to get to our car in the morning with all wheels in tact, and no one with a gun wound.
We wound up booking at a snazzy place right on Beale Street. We then busied ourselves with finding a local BBQ joint to get dinner (Image A ). None of the meals in Memphis disappointed.
After dinner mom decided to turn in and relax in the room (which was good because it probably cost
an immense amount). Glad someone enjoyed it. Brett, Dad, and I soon found that getting a beer was going to be easier than finding a taxi that wasn't pulled by horse. I will get to those guys later.The entire perimeter of downtown Memphis is covered in beer vendors. The company name? Big Ass Beers. How perfect! They indeed sold big ass beers, and also margarita-esque mixed drinks in buckets with a handful of straws. You know, for sharing. Remind me why A: I've never been here before, and B:Why I haven't been back since. (Image B - almost all of us looking at the camera). You can tell this was a few summers ago by the fluffyness of Brett- He was still a handsome devil.
We were there, we saw, and we conquered... almost every other Big Ass beer stand from beginning to end of Beale Street. We camped out for an hour or so to watch some street performers sing the blues, naturally. My dad took a liking to this poor old bastard who was playing the guitar like it was saving his life. So we watched his little street gang of a band play for what seemed like forever. It was spectacular. I have circled little guitar man in (Image C) he is about to scale the railing of the pavilion. Rock on little man, rock on.
Many a beer, and many a blues song later we decided to mosey back to the pricey hotel and get an ear full from mom for our late night shenanigans. There are a lot of horse drawn carriages around town that you
can pay a hefty price to be carted through a tour of the city on. The later it gets the more of these carriages sit parked at the sidewalks. I honestly can't tell you the details of how I managed to do this, but all of my "big ass beers" resulted in me walking into a "big ass horse". A parked big ass horse. I am not sure why Brett and dad (who were directly behind me) didn't see these events unfolding fast enough to quickly move me out of the line of fire. I suspect it is because they were busy laughing and watching in horror. Hilarious horror.
So I full on crash into this horse, and I didn't yell out, or move quickly in embarrassment.
Nope, I just took a step back, and apologized to the horse, and proceeded into the street. Apologized to the horse? Really Stef? Don't worry I am shaking my head too. When we made it back to the room mom didn't scold us, and if she had we would not have heard it through all of the noise coming from the partyers in the streets. I wish I were joking, it was that loud (even from the 7th floor up) until about 4am. Then awkward scary movie silence.
Needless to say, I rather liked Memphis. Who wants to go back with us? I promise I won't run into any parked horses next time. Totally kidding, I make no promises.
- I almost forgot to mention, Rendezvous has the best ribs I have ever tasted
in my life. That place is spectacular.
Sunday, July 1, 2012
Orlando Part 2 - There, and Back Again
Friday got started bright and early thanks to my dad. The only thing missing from his noisy morning routine is a bull horn and a flare gun. I want to say that this is a product of his bad hearing, but I am really not sure. When I finally decided to venture out from under the covers dad prompted this tweet:
When I looked over I was surprised to see my dad in a full suit, he was all dolled up for the graduation. It was cute, would have been cuter if he was being quieter about it but still.
G'Mornin Orlando, if you just heard an old man yelling "I HATE SOCKS", that was just dad. He's ok.
When I looked over I was surprised to see my dad in a full suit, he was all dolled up for the graduation. It was cute, would have been cuter if he was being quieter about it but still.
I apologize for the grainy-ness of the photo, he didn't realize I was taking a picture so it was a rather fast sneak attack snap. From here we went to an unusually unbusy IHOP. It was awkwardly not busy. Downed a bunch of coffee after proclaiming for 30 minutes that I had quit drinking coffee, and proceeded to the graduation. Jitters and all.
It was a fairly fast ceremony, and I don't want to drag on about how proud I am, or how old I feel for my niece to be graduating from college. I also don't want to add here all this sage advice for "the next big step"in her metaphorical life. I actually have a gift for her when she arrives back to GA, and I feel that part of it is so full of useful and philosophical information that I will construct a blog post so that others may glean something from it. A Part 3 if you will.
Dad apparently got antsy and decided that we needed to leave and drive back to GA immediately (so very immediately) after the ceremony. Something about it being 106 degrees and a van that has a tendency to overheat. We had time to snap a few quick pics:
We said farewell and I then shimmied my way into a spot inside the van, just knowing that as we hit the trail I was just one good divot in the road from losing an eye. I realized in no time flat that if I felt like engaging anyone in conversation I was going to be repeating everything that I said at least 3x thanks to dad's hearing. For 8 hours? No thanks, i'll just pop these ear buds in and sign off. I told my parent's "Hey, i'm putting these headphones on, so I can't hear you guys- if you need me wave your hand or something." I am pretty sure they heard "Wah, wah wah wah, wah wah wah."
Took about 10 minutes before I realized that about every 5 minutes one of them was looking at me menacingly, awaiting a response to a question I clearly never heard. After re-explaining my music situation I came up with an idea. I figured they probably don't want to talk to each other, dad clearly has no idea how this ear bud thing works, and I really want to finish reading about this Apocalypse adventure...So I said (while still keeping my ear buds in) "Hey dad, can you turn the music up?" And he did, on their radio. I proceeded to request that the volume on their radio be increased until it was loud enough that no one was talking. Hello win. Granted, at this point my personal music volume was now making my own ears bleed. I could then finish my book while the melodies of Flogging Molly blared into my brain. I took a pic inside the loudest van this side of the Mississippi:
Eventually I dumped my technology and music and payed attention to my parents like a good child does. I want to say it probably was not a direct correlation to my draining battery either.
On the subject of technology I see that I missed nothing whatsoever on Facebook whilst we traveled for 2 days (there and back again). Let's see ah yes here is what the newsfeed looks like : everyone is hot and "melting", you all hate Obama and his healthcare, and you all want to see some dude named Mike and his buddies get naked. Got it. My personal observations? It is summer time why are you so surprised, I have a better healthcare plan-it is called diet and exercise, and Magic Mike? Ladies, you know what you are coming home to when your 2 hours is up and your $20 is gone so maybe try to pay attention to him.You know that if he was acting a fool about seeing a movie with a bunch of naked chicks in it you would be all like "Oh Hell Nah!". So stop being a hypocrite and keep your pants on.
However, Twitter taught me that Adele is pregnant, and Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are divorcing. The only thing that would make either of those tidbits any better is if Adele's baby was Tom's. Rumour has it not.
Sidenotes: The van made it back home without overheating, though it sounded like it was about to rocket into outer space for the last 2 hours of the trip. I didn't lose an eye. No one got hurt. Oh and no one ate egg salad, I did however contemplate eating a can of play doh.
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Orlando Part 1- There, but not Back Again
Anyways, we were scheduled to leave at 11:00am on Thursday, which probably killed my dad because he always embarks on road trips before 5am. The babysitter showed up a few minutes before 11, so I took my backpack and my fancy Nascar cooler (be jealous) full of snacks and went to sit in the driveway so that my inpatient father wouldn't honk the horn at me and wake Adeline from her nap. And I sat, and sat for what seemed like a long time out in the scorching hot. I called dad and asked him when they were coming to get me, and he said "oh I didn't know we were supposed to". After explaining that it made more sense to leave my vehicle with the carseat at my house, you know, in case anyone felt like taking Adeline anywhere at any point he just huffed and said fine we are on our way. Why thank you. So the trip started off with them forgetting to come and get me.
Once we were on the road a few hours our first stop wasn't to pee or get gas, it was to pick! My dad has a problem. We went to a man's house down a tiny dirt road to pick up a roll of screen that was designed for a screen door. "It's rare". Well of course it is, you know what else is rare? My chances of actually making it to Florida without going crazy. I thought for sure we would be stopping several times to pick up super duper rare items before I ever saw GA again. I was also informed at pit stop #1 that we couldn't stop/turn off the van because it could possibly overheat. I just thought in my head, if this van does overheat I could possibly jump into oncoming traffic.
First off - don't spend too much time admiring my undeniably amazing graphics that I most certainly didn't create in a Paint program. Next, I busied myself with billboard watching once we hit the Byron GA area, which was about the time I realized that every billboard from there to Macon was covered in Jesus is my homeboy messages. I saw the words; Jesus, God, Sin, Hell, Repent, Save, and Eternal about 285,000,000 times. I know right? That's a lot. Once we got to the Valdosta area they changed things up. At that point I am speculating the billboard designers felt that the areas following all the way to Orlando were too late for Jesus, they were all crazy sinful fornicators because the following 285,000,000 billboards I spotted were about saving babies, and preventing the abomination that is abortion. Seriously, every billboard had a baby, a fetus, or a crying teenage female on it.
To save time and money we ate sandwiches in the van (or maybe that was because we couldn't stop the vehicle). Anyways, I brought my own but everyone else had egg salad sandwiches. Because that's what you do when you ride in a van full of people for 8 hours, you eat smashed up boiled eggs. My brother in law learned the hard way not to take a look into my Nascar cooler of goodies. After asking what I had in there I pointed out the contents of my lunch : my sandwich, rice cakes, and a pack of birth control. To my surprise he wasn't interested in what I had packed after that.
After lunch I thought it was the perfect time to read. My mom had suggested I pack a new book on parenting, but much to her dismay I actually just brought a graphic novel, Y The Last Man. I think that learning about what a post apocalyptic world would be like if all of the men on earth died at one time is extremely beneficial. The upside was that it is a comic, so lots of pictures which is conducive to not getting sick from reading too many words. Nobody likes a book with too many words.
Once we crept closer to Orlando I soon learned that Orlando is the land of tolls. It would be significantly more awesome if it were a land of trolls. We spent $6.75 within a 6 mile radius. It was the craziest crap ever. My dad cursing at each toll booth. I guess that alleviates the stress of dropping 1,500 coins into an electronic toll machine and waiting for it to allow you to continue driving.
We met up with the rest of the family, and some of Chelsia's friends and had dinner at Houlihan's. Mmmmm. Then we packed the van up with all of Chelsia's belongings. Which is when I posted this picture:
That blank space in between the dozens of lamps and packing sheet is where I was supposed to be sitting comfortably. Hindsight I have a question - why does my niece have so many lamps? Anyways, we took the van full of stuff to the hotel. Which is when I tweeted this:
Stefanie Jones
This place is swell, especially if you like crack and hookers!
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Happy Trails
We just took our new rv out on it's maiden voyage for Memorial Day weekend. I won't digress with the specifics of our new home on wheels, I don't need to tell you all what I own and where to find it. She is parked at an undisclosed location, and she is heavily insured. At any rate, we camped with family at a local lakeside national park/recreation campground. My dad was in charge of the reservations so that is why we were less than 35 miles of our homes. I can't decide if I like this arrangement or not. I guess it will do while Adeline is still so little in case there is some sort of emergency.
However, the gate keepers at this particular campground are straight up nazis. They are old, they are retirees, and their motto is "this is real life - we take shit seriously". One of the "rules" there is that there is a 2 dog max per campsite. We have 3 dogs. BUT my parents always camp next to us so we always say that Agadore belongs to them. We walk them separately to avoid any issue. We tied up Bacon and Banana at our site, and Agadore at mom's site, and they met in the middle to drink water and nap in the sun. This act of napping in the same vicinity was such a harsh crime that they (the park ranger) actually sent the gate keeper to come and yell at us, and threaten to kick us out without refund for allowing such a heinous act to occur. Once again, "this is real life-we take shit seriously". What is even better is that he actually thought we were to take him seriously, as he had arrived to deliver the bad news to us via his scooter, and sporting a helmet with a flame paint job. The helmet was almost as cool as his knee length black socks. I just don't understand, why not go bust chops at a neighboring campsite full of rowdy drunk tent campers? Or the people with one big ass dog that has been barking for 3 days straight. Who cares if I have 10 dogs, they aren't barking, biting, or bothering anyone. I guess that is why people just tent camp wherever they want to, and avoid situations like this altogether.
Aside from the non existent dog issue, our child was acting like a crack baby from Thursday until Monday. To say that she bounced off every surface of our rv is a severe understatement. For some reason we thought she would enjoy sleeping in a pack n play for the weekend. This would provide me with hours of evening reading time, I even brought 2 books just for safe measure. Looking back now I am laughing at myself for ever thinking I could enjoy an entire book for the next 18 years. Back to the sleep situation- I am convinced that in her little mind she sees that pack n play and thinks "death trap".
Night #1 consisted of 5.5 hours of straight screaming and crying to the point of almost throwing up. I rocked her, I tried to get her to sleep on the couch, on a pallet on the floor, in the bed, and repeat, and repeat. Around 1am she finally just quit, passing out face down on top of a dog and in between us on the big bed. This was the method of going to sleep for the next 4 days, naps included. The process of her winding down to get to sleep consisted of lots of rolling, crawling, bouncing, "accidentally" smacking me, "accidentally" smacking the dogs, making fart noises, and saying Thank You. What was supposed to be a relaxing weekend was absolutely exhausting. If I wasn't afraid that the old wrinkle bag gate keeper wouldn't come and give me a citation on his gay little scooter I would have probably just tied her to a chair at the campsite just to give us a break (totally kidding, I wouldn't tie her to anything, duct tape is much sturdier and harder to escape).
Maybe our next excursion the camping gods will smile upon us, this time they obviously just looked on and laughed at us.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
roadtrip
So this Saturday, April the 2nd we took our first road trip with the baby. I was nervous. But it was awesome. We left around 6am for Columbia SC to visit my bestie Amanda. (I really need to post about our unique friendship that pretty much survived a 13 year gap with flying colors). Anyways - we were on the road so we could see her. Adeline slept the entire drive there. Entire. We got to Amanda's exit in Columbia and Adeline's eyes popped open, which was perfect.
Stop 1 was Amanda's coffee shop College Grounds, and we sampled some amazing doughnuts that she made for us! Stop 2 was the Riverbanks zoo - which is apparently one of the top 3 zoos in the nation. We really had an awesome time. And? It was Brett's first trip to a real deal zoo. Yea, crazy right? There is no reason why a man should see his first giraffe in real life at the age of 27 (unless he lives in a 3rd world country, or a cage in a basement cellar or something). His parents get an F for not ever taking him to a real zoo when he was little, or his schools get an F for not taking him on a field trip to one! shameful! Anyways, it was a huge zoo with an aquarium, and an elaborate botanical gardens area. Here we are:
Stop 1 was Amanda's coffee shop College Grounds, and we sampled some amazing doughnuts that she made for us! Stop 2 was the Riverbanks zoo - which is apparently one of the top 3 zoos in the nation. We really had an awesome time. And? It was Brett's first trip to a real deal zoo. Yea, crazy right? There is no reason why a man should see his first giraffe in real life at the age of 27 (unless he lives in a 3rd world country, or a cage in a basement cellar or something). His parents get an F for not ever taking him to a real zoo when he was little, or his schools get an F for not taking him on a field trip to one! shameful! Anyways, it was a huge zoo with an aquarium, and an elaborate botanical gardens area. Here we are:
One of my favorite parts was the kangaroo "walk about" where you literally walk into and through the kangaroo exhibit. I am convinced that all of the kangaroos and walabees were in fact, drunk. Like this guy:
Then we hiked to the botanical gardens vs. riding the trolley like all of the fatties. A woman (who rode the trolley) asked how in the world I was wearing a sleeveless shirt because it was cold - I wanted to say "because I actually used my legs and walked here so I feel fine." but refrained. And she asked if we were from Canada, to which Brett said, why yes British Columbia actually. This lady had interrupted our conversation about sister wives (the tv show), so we picked back up where we left off ( which I think was some joke about Amanda making all of the money and me making the babies). So the lady stared at us the entire time we were in the gardens. Brett is such a pimp. haha. We then walked to the aquarium, where we discovered that I am in fact taller than a penguin:
Our zoo trip was over and we ended our day trip to SC with dinner at Hunter Gatherer. I got to see Amanda's parents for the first time in 14 years, so that was really great. The ride home didn't go so well, Adeline was fighting sleep like a samurai warrior. The highways in SC are, well, shit. You know when you were a kid and someone would bounce you up and down so that you make those funny noises when you talk? yea, Adeline was doing that, but crying. But when we made it to smoother roads she passed right out.
Then we hiked to the botanical gardens vs. riding the trolley like all of the fatties. A woman (who rode the trolley) asked how in the world I was wearing a sleeveless shirt because it was cold - I wanted to say "because I actually used my legs and walked here so I feel fine." but refrained. And she asked if we were from Canada, to which Brett said, why yes British Columbia actually. This lady had interrupted our conversation about sister wives (the tv show), so we picked back up where we left off ( which I think was some joke about Amanda making all of the money and me making the babies). So the lady stared at us the entire time we were in the gardens. Brett is such a pimp. haha. We then walked to the aquarium, where we discovered that I am in fact taller than a penguin:
Our zoo trip was over and we ended our day trip to SC with dinner at Hunter Gatherer. I got to see Amanda's parents for the first time in 14 years, so that was really great. The ride home didn't go so well, Adeline was fighting sleep like a samurai warrior. The highways in SC are, well, shit. You know when you were a kid and someone would bounce you up and down so that you make those funny noises when you talk? yea, Adeline was doing that, but crying. But when we made it to smoother roads she passed right out. Monday, March 7, 2011
Dear Ireland, I miss you terribly.
For starters, I checked the forecast this morning and it was 20 degrees warmer in Kenmare than it was here at home.
Aside from the coldness this morning, I realized that just this time last year I was sitting in PF McCarthy's with Mr. Jones drinking a big ol pint of Guinness. We instantly fell in love with Kenmare - the town was cute, awesome, old school, and well I could totally call it home.
I always wonder what it would be like to live in Ireland, you know, if money weren't an issue (or the pesky citizenship process) Lord knows we are having a hard enough time with immigration here in the states, and we let damn near everyone in.!
Anyways, I am getting side tracked yet again. Thinking about our big trip to the emerald isle also reminded me that we stood on the "wishing steps" at the gardens of Blarney castle and it hit me.
me to myself: "Holy shit, do you remember what you wished for on those steps?! A baby, you wished that you would have a baby soon and that baby would be healthy and happy."
And guess what kids? Wasn't a month or more from being home that we had barely started to think of being pregnant and bam we were. I asked Brett last night what he had wished for on the wishing steps, and he had wished the very same thing. (it's like a freakin story book isn't it? haha).
So, I am going to get my ass back to those wishing steps and wish to win the lottery so that we can come back to Kenmare and make it our home (or our second home - that would work too). In the meantime I should find an author or illustrator of children's books so I can hammer out some deets and make a book for Adeline about her mommy and daddy and this Ireland adventure - since she did come from a simple wish after all.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
day two for twosday
Killarney National Park - Day 2
This unbelievable park was about a 5 minute drive from our townhouse, but we spent an entire day driving through and stopping every few minutes to take pictures. The entire park is 26,000 acres large.
There really aren't any photos that
can do this park justice. I have never experienced anything like it in my
life.
While heading to another stop at the park, we drove up on a sheep farmer with his dog and 30 sheep. We slowed to a stop to allow the rest of the herd to be led up a hill, and while still stopped we watched the entire herd of 30 sheep as they ran full speed back down the hill AT OUR CAR. Brett and I just sat there saying
"Oh shit oh shit oh shit!"
" What do we do?!?!?!?"
They got, maybe, 8 inches from the Barbie car and then split into a v formation and ran right around us. -- Sooooo glad I didn't have to pee.
We followed the adventures at Killarney up with a stop at Foley's Pub for dinner. Pretty sure that the dinner I had would be on my list of possibilities for my death row meal (you know, if I knew I had one last meal to eat on this earth)
We watched a little tv before we went to bed, interesting stuff! They cuss like sailors and I love it. We watched a few minutes of Teens in the Wild (and no that's not dirty!) and it was hilarious to see the girls ranting and warning they "were tinkin' about bloodyin eachoters fookin eyes out" aka.. they were about to smack down some bitches! haha. Never in the states will we be able to cuss on network television. Ah well, I can dream.
and so ended our second day of adventure
Monday, March 22, 2010
Travelling Pants
So I was trying to find the best way to write about the SPECTACULAR trip to Ireland. I think I will spend the next few posts writing about some of the crazy stuff from our trip, accompanied by some photographs of course... I actually kept a journal during our "holiday" because I knew my internet access would be extremely limited.
Travel day- (Sort of day 1)
Dear Hartsfield Airport,
My IQ is dropping... rapidly. Please encourage Continental Airlines to administer some sort of simple exam to new/potential employees. My mutt Agadore Spartacus has better grammar, and has a wider vocabulary than 90% of the employees we have encountered since we arrived in Atlanta. Agadore would also pass your obviously non existent drug test as well.
KThxBai
Mrs.Jones
---We finally get to the lovely Newark NJ, have an ungodly layover and then get on the plane. The oh so fun male flight attendant made an announcement - the announcement:
"Gina Pouch...Pooch? You have a package to claim, Gina Pouch."
um, do you mean like vaGINA POUCH?!?!? I believe sir, that you have been punked. Naturally vaGINA Pouch did not claim her package. hahaha
---We land in Shannon, and exchange our money (cried inside at the exchange rate) and got to the Hertz kiosk to rent our car. The guy gave us the option for the "Full Coverage" Insurance which we wanted to deny. We either had a choice to take it for an extra 10euro per day, or they would hold $1,200 on our card until we returned. Die in a fire Hertz. Die in a fire. We took the full and walked out to our parking space:
Brett: What parking space # are we?
Me: 22
Brett: You have got to be shitting me. IT'S F*CKING PINK. THEY GAVE US A PINK CAR!
--I could barely finish carrying my bags I was laughing so hard. Notice I was still cracking up even after I got in the Barbie car.
We then realize we have no directions to where we are going. They are back in GA. Joy. Luckily the Douche at Hertz gave us a life size map of the entire country to use. Entertainment ensued. We get out on the main road and are super confident we got this shit down. Where do we end up? BACK AT THE AIRPORT. Son of a bitch.
We get back on the main road to try this again, and we did fine. We took the long way to where we were going, but we made it. It's a christmas miracle everyone! We did encounter one traffic jam in Limerick, which was caused by 4 horses that got loose. Ha.
We pretty much crashed once we made it to our townhouse in Kenmare. Woke up in time for beer and dinner and that was it. We survived Day 1 (barely!)
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Leaving on a Jet Plane
This will be the last post I can sneak in before we head to Ireland.
So far I am a mixture of excited and nervous.
Quite simply...I don't get out much. Ha!
As far as travelling goes this is true.
The only times I have left the country it has been with family(ahem my mama!), and just on cruises and stuff like that.
The thought of Brett and I venturing out and figuring out how to get around, having enough Euros to have fun, taking care of all of the odds and ends...well kinda scares me.
I am convinced my parents practiced some form of attachment parenting. Which is all good and well, but I think I got a little too "attached"- so much that the thought of being away from "home" scares the shit out of me. I get homesick super fast and super easy. (for example- we just moved out and on our own...and we are less than 2 miles from mom and dad!) When I was growing up it was so bad that I couldn't even spend the night with friends until I was a teenager! What. a. dork.
Then I met Brett, and later married him - I could tell that the attachment idea transferred over to him. Now if I travel sans husband, I get homesick and freak at the thought of having to leave my new "home" for long. So much to the point that I limit calls to home so that I don't get all mushy emotional.
Let's hope this doesn't happen in Ireland, I will have him there the whole time so the main thing I will get to miss is Agadore Spartacus. Right?
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
The Emerald Isle
In less than a month Brett and I will be drinking a pint in the Southwest town of Kenmare, Ireland. I honestly am having a hard time waiting to pack my bags!
notice how he is much larger than standard sized furniture (he makes the fridge look like a Coleman cooler!). He is 6'5''-6'7'' ish depending on his shoes, and an easy 285lbs.
With the new house renovation, constant family drama, and friends twisting the knives they've stuck in my back, I am seriously going to have such a great time being in a different country!
I do, however, foresee Brett and I coming across a few obstacles during our adventures in Ireland.
I am going to call the obstacles "bloopers" because it will probably be some really funny shit.
Blooper #1: The rental car.
When we arrive at the Shannon airport after hours & hours of flying and layover time, we will pick up our rental car. The sweet ride we are getting hooked up with? a Nissan MICRA. The name screams tiny car. Notice the correlation between MICRA and MICROscopic?
So here is the deal,
This is Brett in our old, normal sized apartment:
notice how he is much larger than standard sized furniture (he makes the fridge look like a Coleman cooler!). He is 6'5''-6'7'' ish depending on his shoes, and an easy 285lbs.
Now, the "Micra" we will be picking up (literally) can be found here. Oh the joys of making your husband uncomfortable. Nevermind that he will be A-driving on the wrong side of the road, and B-operating a stick shift on the opposite side. It should be the most entertaining thing to watch!
Blooper #2: Navigating in the pocket size car
Not to knock on him, but Brett would get lost trying to get out of our driveway if he didn't have me around. I am not sure if that is because he knows what he knows, and our little town and the city of Atlanta is not something he is used to yet or what. But bless his heart he gets turned around super easy. And I am noticing as I try to map out various stops during our vacation that no place has a direct address! No street numbers, rarely a street name, just landmarks. Good thing we have no planes or trains to catch (until the end of the trip of course). I foresee us stopping and asking for directions. A lot. I will probably be doing the asking, I don't see Brett taking the car off and putting it back on too easily!
Blooper #3: My tolerance level for alcohol
I am not sure what happened over the span of a few short years... But, for some reason, my 21st birthday marked the death of my tolerance for booze. Shortly after my megadeathbirthday I could barely get a drink or two in before I was seriously buzzed. I switched to beer. That helped me none. With all of the pubs and pints we will be partaking in during our trip I foresee fun times. Fun Times. So, I guess Brett will be lugging me over one shoulder in Ireland, and our Nissan Micra over the other. I will probably look a little something like this:
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photo and t-shirt courtesy of my Canadian husband.
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