Dead Horse

I posted this in a note on facebook (or was it myspace? gasp!) back in August of 2008 and I feel it bears repeating:

You can't beat a dead horse

-So go ahead and pick up the shovel

I wish I had realized this a long time ago. You can't fix people, you can't change people. The only person that you can work on is yourself.

Life gets crappy, but it stays crappy only if you let it. If it's people who are making your life crappy, don't wait around wasting your time and energy trying to make them stop. Just go do your own thing.

People lie, some lie big, some lie small. If you find yourself around those who lie big, just let them lie to themselves - they aren't worth your time.

When it comes to fixing people, if at first you don't succeed, just give up.

Why am I writing this? Because people like to beat dead horses, I have done it, you probably know someone who has done it too.

Fair weather friends, shitty relationships, weird family situations, every once in a while we are faced with a "dead horse" and by thinking that we are helping out, we beat them, we try to talk them into going a different way, try talking them into being nicer, or my favorite - hoping they will be smarter. We try to give advice, we try to give money, or other material things. We just know that if they change everyone will be better off.

And that is correct, in most cases we would be better off if we could fix them. But some people don't want to be fixed.

And if they act like they want to be rescued, it is only a matter of time before they are broken once again.

So quit beating your dead horses, just pick up the shovel, and bury their asses, and then start living your life for you, because at the end of the day the battle is with yourself. And if your dead horses give a shit about you, or themselves, they will dig right out of that hole on their own.