Sunday, July 1, 2012

Orlando Part 2 - There, and Back Again

Friday got started bright and early thanks to my dad. The only thing missing from his noisy morning routine is a bull horn and a flare gun. I want to say that this is a product of his bad hearing, but I am really not sure. When I finally decided to venture out from under the covers dad prompted this tweet:

G'Mornin Orlando, if you just heard an old man yelling "I HATE SOCKS", that was just dad. He's ok.

When I looked over I was surprised to see my dad in a full suit, he was all dolled up for the graduation. It was cute, would have been cuter if he was being quieter about it but still.
I apologize for the grainy-ness of the photo, he didn't realize I was taking a picture so it was a rather fast sneak attack snap. From here we went to an unusually unbusy IHOP. It was awkwardly not busy. Downed a bunch of coffee after proclaiming for 30 minutes that I had quit drinking coffee, and proceeded to the graduation. Jitters and all. 

It was a fairly fast ceremony, and I don't want to drag on about how proud I am, or how old I feel for my niece to be graduating from college. I also don't want to add here all this sage advice for "the next big step"in her metaphorical life. I actually have a gift for her when she arrives back to GA, and I feel that part of it is so full of useful and philosophical information that I will construct a blog post so that others may glean something from it. A Part 3 if you will

Dad apparently got antsy and decided that we needed to leave and drive back to GA immediately (so very immediately) after the ceremony. Something about it being 106 degrees and a van that has a tendency to overheat. We had time to snap a few quick pics:
We said farewell and I then shimmied my way into a spot inside the van, just knowing that as we hit the trail I was just one good divot in the road from losing an eye. I realized in no time flat that if I felt like engaging anyone in conversation I was going to be repeating everything that I said at least 3x thanks to dad's hearing. For 8 hours? No thanks, i'll just pop these ear buds in and sign off. I told my parent's "Hey, i'm putting these headphones on, so I can't hear you guys- if you need me wave your hand or something." I am pretty sure they heard "Wah, wah wah wah, wah wah wah." 

Took about 10 minutes before I realized that about every 5 minutes one of them was looking at me menacingly, awaiting a response to a question I clearly never heard. After re-explaining my music situation I came up with an idea. I figured they probably don't want to talk to each other, dad clearly has no idea how this ear bud thing works, and I really want to finish reading about this Apocalypse adventure...So I said (while still keeping my ear buds in) "Hey dad, can you turn the music up?" And he did, on their radio. I proceeded to request that the volume on their radio be increased until it was loud enough that no one was talking. Hello win. Granted, at this point my personal music volume was now making my own ears bleed. I could then finish my book while the melodies of Flogging Molly blared into my brain. I took a pic inside the loudest van this side of the Mississippi:

Eventually I dumped my technology and music and payed attention to my parents like a good child does. I want to say it probably was not a direct correlation to my draining battery either. 

On the subject of technology I see that I missed nothing whatsoever on Facebook whilst we traveled for 2 days (there and back again). Let's see ah yes here is what the newsfeed looks like : everyone is hot and "melting", you all hate Obama and his healthcare, and you all want to see some dude named Mike and his buddies get naked. Got it. My personal observations? It is summer time why are you so surprised, I have a better healthcare plan-it is called diet and exercise, and Magic Mike? Ladies, you know what you are coming home to when your 2 hours is up and your $20 is gone so maybe try to pay attention to him.You know that if he was acting a fool about seeing a movie with a bunch of naked chicks in it you would be all like "Oh Hell Nah!". So stop being a hypocrite and keep your pants on. 
However, Twitter taught me that Adele is pregnant, and Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are divorcing. The only thing that would make either of those tidbits any better is if Adele's baby was Tom's. Rumour has it not.


Sidenotes: The van made it back home without overheating, though it sounded like it was about to rocket into outer space for the last 2 hours of the trip. I didn't lose an eye. No one got hurt. Oh and no one ate egg salad, I did however contemplate eating a can of play doh. 

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